DEBT MOM WANTS TO KNOW: ARE YOU CONSTANTLY TRYING TO BE BETTER WITH MONEY BUT STILL FIND YOURSELF OVERSPENDING?

All the little things can add up quickly. The grocery cart, brown Amazon boxes arriving on your doorstep, Target and Walmart runs that go overboard… it’s life and it happens.

And it’s usually not laziness or a lack of discipline. A lot of daily overspending comes from bad spending habits, stress, boredom, and even dopamine chasing. That’s right, shopping gives people “the feels,” and often tied to our emotions.

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Let’s talk first about emotional spending.

Sometimes that’s what it boils down to.

Thing about it:
You have a bad day, buy something to pick yourself up.
Have a good day, go reed yourself and treat yourself.
Feeling sad or left out, go grab “a little something to brighten your mood.” Doom scrolling on instagram and Pinterest and Youtube and think, “THAT THING will make my life better.”

Most likely it won’t.
But companies know how emotional spending works. They know FOMO works. The emotional spending wins so many times, they’re actually banking in it; and your bank account is paying the price.

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Sometimes it’s not about the thing you’re actually purchasing, it’s the feeling you get from buying the thing. Enter the dopamine hit!

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Then there’s the convenience spending…

And honestly, this one gets a LOT of people.

Things like:
Grabbing take out because you’re not in the mood to cook.
Buying duplicate items you forgot you already had.
Last minute purchase, you bought on a whim before planning.

It happens to us all. It just shouldn’t be an every day occurrence.

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You can’t forget all those little extras.

And what about the little things. You know the $5 her and $10 there stuff. And then, the next thing you know, it’s the end of the month and you’re $200 over budget.
A few examples of little things that you might not even consider are:

• Amazon add-ons
• “little treats”
• clearance shopping
• Starbucks runs
• beauty products/skincare backups
• Impromptu lunch with a friend

All of the extra spending, financial death by a thousand purchases, is what robs you of money that could be put to better use.

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Do you know your fantasy self?

This one is my favorite, and I fall prey to this from time to time, your “fantasy self.” I’m sure you know exactly what I’m talking about. Buying stuff you think is going to help you live your best life, and then it never gets used. You’re buying for the version of the person you wish you were.

Buying for:

• the organized woman
• the gym girl
• the perfectly decorated house
• the woman who meal preps
• the woman bullet journals
• vacation fantasy life
• clothes you never wear that still have the tags on them

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Debt Mom Pep-talk:

This isn’t to say you should never spend money ever again. That’s not how life works, because we’re real people, not robots.

But what it does mean is you should pause… think about what you’re wanting to buy and why you’re wanting or needing to make that purchase, BEFORE you buy something.

Just ask yourself one simple question: “Why do I want this?”

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A few tips and tricks.

Here are a few simple ways to reset and save:

• pause before impulse purchases
• create a 24-hour rule
• unfollow temptation accounts on social media platforms
• remove saved payment methods
• keep a “want list”
• plan a small reward into your budget
• identify your top 3 spending triggers
• learn replacement behaviors

Listen, I’m not saying you need to become a minimalist and live like a monk. Just think about what you’re getting ready to spend your money on, before actually doing it. Most of the time, you’ll probably end up talking yourself out of it!

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To sum up…

Your overspending habits weren’t created overnight. This means it’s going to take a bit of time to rewire your habits. Just pause, take a breath and wait before making an unplanned purchase, or buying a thing that’s not a true necessity.

Over time as you continue to curb your spending, and pause to buy, you’re telling your brain that it’s OK to wait, or do without the instant gratification. And that’s building a good spending habit.

Doing this over time, will reinforce good spending habits, and become your new norm. This is how change actually happens, and that would look great on your new real self!